Friday, May 6, 2011

Remembered.

It is a day so many of us have dreamed of- pictured ourselves being showered with gifts of dandelion bouquets and cards with painted hand prints- Mother's Day-

And yet for so many of us this day has not been what we thought- As we come up on yet another Mother's Day, I want you to pause and remember-

Remember the woman who lost her mother and though she may be surrounded by children, she is missing her mentor, her friend, her mom.

Remember the woman who lost her child and though she may be surrounded by children, she is missing the child who would have been- her daughter, her son.

Remember the woman who lost her dreams and though she never was pregnant she dreamed, and wished and prayed only to have her life take a different path.

They will be around you this mother's day- and you may not even know it-
Will you remember them?

I think back to that first mother's day. The one I had dreamed of. I had thought I would have had a flower pinned to my blouse as I sang praises to the God who blessed me so with two babies in my arms. How different that day was for me. I sat- a flower pinned to my blouse- singing praises to the God who blessed me so with one baby in my arms. I knew that this was not the day I had expected- far from it-, and yet I tried to play the part and I could look at my son and be thankful that he was- for I still remembered those moments they told me he was not.

But it wasn't long before my tears began to fall. I could see him out of the corner of my eye as his shoulders began to shake and he blotted his eyes with his handkerchief- My Grandpa- My Grandpa Jonasen- My living son's namesake. He looked over at me, with my son in my arms and he burst into tears. For he- more than most in that church- knew what I was going through.

His wife had done this- gone through 28 mother's days without her son- killed two months before I was born. What had that been like for my Nana? Sure I was a welcomed distraction that first mother's day for her (much like my Jonasen was for me) but what was that first mother's day like without her son. He had died in October. Had people remembered her in May?

This Sunday there will be a woman having that first Mother's Day or maybe she's had many- a Mother's Day far different than she had expected- and she may be watched- as other's wonder what to do... what to say... or she may be forgotten- as other's wish her well not knowing what lies behind her smile- the wonder- the dreams of what Mother's Day COULD have been.

I hope you remember.

Wishing you a peaceful Mother's Day-
And that you will be remembered-
For your strength
For your grace
For your love

Remembered.

11 comments:

  1. Beautiful Laura. Thinking of you, tomorrow just won't be what it should for either of us.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I love reading your posts here. They are so deep, powerful and meaningful. I heart you!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Perfect, Laura. You capture all that Mother's Day really means to so many of us and those of us who get that thank you for your eloquence.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I love this! Thank you so much for sharing! <3

    ReplyDelete
  5. Wow, that brought tears to my eyes. I never thought about all the other people missing their mothers, or those without children. It gave me a new perspective on my infertile friends, and those with similar losses. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  6. tears... wonderful post, thank you for sharing. You are a very talented and articulated writer!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Beautiful! Thank you for sharing. ♥

    ReplyDelete
  8. you are a blessing, Laura. I've always felt that the best thing I could do for the son I lost is to let God's love and light shine through the life he had and not to allow bitterness to grow in me from his death. you truly inspire me. much love to all the mommies for a [belated] mother's day. ♥

    ReplyDelete
  9. you are a blessing, Laura. I've always felt that the best thing I could do for the son I lost is to let God's love and light shine through the life he had and not to allow bitterness to grow in me from his death. you truly inspire me. much love to all the mommies for a [belated] mother's day. ♥

    ReplyDelete
  10. tears... wonderful post, thank you for sharing. You are a very talented and articulated writer!

    ReplyDelete

Your thoughts?