Saturday, December 29, 2012

You Remembered.

Holidays are hard.
Especially for those who have lost someone in the last year...
The parties. The gatherings. The laughter.
Sometimes you wonder if they remember.

The Christmases have gone by for me.  10 of them now.
I have gone to the parties. The gatherings. The laughter has been mine.
Still sometimes I wonder if they remember.

My birthday is on Christmas Eve.
A day where I know I will sing, Silent Night and think about the greatest gift, and the gifts He gave me.
And I will think about that silent night when he was born.
The silent delivery room.
The silence when he arrived.
I will sing, as silent tears fall.
Every year.

Like Mother's Day, I have mixed feelings every Christmas Eve.
This year, my mom handed me a bag with two boxes in it.
I opened the first and saw a beautiful necklace.
A family of birds sitting on a branch.
2 big birds.
4 little birds.

I couldn't really look at it.  Are those two things on the end of the branch butterflies?
My mom shook her head no.
"They are just leaves."

"I think they're butterflies."
"They're not."

My heart hurt a little and I choked back tears.  Ten years but certainly she remembered.  My mom who has listened to my journey~ walked it with me.  My mom who once answered that questions "How many grandchildren do you have?" with, "My son has two and my daughter has four 'at home'."
Yes.  I heard.  I hear it all.
We all do.

How could she forget.
I wanted to cry.

And then I opened the next box.

A pair of earrings.
Two birds.
Two birds that left the branch.
And flew away.
Too soon.

I love them more than you know.
I love more that you remembered.

Thank you!


  1. Wow is all I can say!

    1. Thanks! I feel the same way! I think I will wear them always! <3

  2. The most thoughtful gift from a mother who loves you deeply and knows your heart.

    1. She does! I don't think you really realize how much your mother loves you until you become a mother yourself. Thank you, Debby!

  3. Angela Sarkesian GrossDecember 29, 2012 at 9:00 PM

    I'm crying! What a truly special gift! You are all so fortunate to have each other, what awesome mom's you both are! Thank you for sharing!<3

    1. <3 Feeling blessed!!! I totally understand how hurt people get when people forget. I also think though that it is important to let those who love us most know what we need. My mom is awesome! And so are you Ang! <3

  4. No words, only feeling the love... <3

  5. What beautiful jewellery and what a dear mother you have. I would have been worrying that the little birds had been forgotten too. I like to have something to symbolise G in our family.
    I hope that your birthday passed peacefully for you, the image of you thinking silent night has me in tears. Remembering Andrew and your little E xo

  6. Very very sweet Laura. Brought tears to my eyes. I got two angel ornaments this year with my bits birthstone. Prob my favorite gift of all. Just knowing other people are thinking of them and remembering them is heartwarming. Happy holidays friend - I miss you


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