Monday, February 22, 2010

Twenty-two

November 1, 2005.
Over two years.
We had a daughter at home.
We had "babies" at home.

I was healing.
The world was spinning.
And we were happy.
We were healing.

And yet, I still missed him.
I continued to go to support group meetings each month.
More as the supporter- than the supported-
More to say his name-
To remember him-
To make it matter-

I had a fear I may forget- may stop going each month- stop speaking his name as I had-
But it had only been two years.
Would things change in time?

I didn't want to forget him.
Not ever.
I was smiling again and I was afraid the world would forget him.
I didn't want them to forget him.
Not ever.

So I went to the meetings-
I spoke our story-
And on November 1, 2005
Others heard our story too-
His story-
Because it was featured in a newspaper.

I read our story-
Our words-
Saw pictures of my hands-
holding his hat, his footprints, his things-
And for a moment- He was remembered-

Remembered beyond us- beyond the safety of the walls where my beloved meetings took place.
He was remembered still- but now by people we hadn't ever met-
They saw his name-

I was teaching at the time.
The school day had ended and I was erasing the chalkboard.
When I noticed a woman was standing at my door.
She held something in her hand. She had a warm smile and asked if she could have a moment.

I welcomed her in.
She said that she had children who had attended the school years ago.
Before my time.
She was very nice.

And that's when she pulled out a frame.
A large frame with four footprints.
Her eyes glazed as they met mine.
She told me it hangs in her home still.

Under each footprint was a name.
She pointed to one and said, "That one would be twenty-two." I heard her voice break. "She would have been twenty-two. You won't forget."
I stared at the footprints.
The name.
Her name.
Given twenty-two years ago.
Taken home twenty-two years ago.
Remembered.
Twenty-two.
And I remember her still.

I'll remember him still.
Remember him.
Share him.
Andrew.

8 comments:

  1. You got me again! I always tear up reading your posts, they are so heartfelt and honest. Thank you for sharing Laura. This road leads to forever and ever land, where our babies are never forgotten. Hugs, Nan xo

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  2. "When a baby's cry is stilled, hearts are broken." True, but hearts -- even those which have been broken -- always remember. We'll remember with you 'til Andrew would be 22, and beyond... as we carry our angels with us, always in our hearts. Love you, friend.

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  3. it's so good to be able to remember. No matter how happy we are with the blessing that God has given us, we still remember and still hold them close to our heart.

    Keiki Milimili would have been 19 years old this year. Trevor would have been 16. Liam would have been 9. And, Zoe, Chloe's twin sister, would have been 8 this year. I remember them all and always will.

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  4. Love what Mary said.... we will always remember

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  5. Thank you for sharing Andrew with us here. We will always remember him. x

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  6. Thanks for stopping at my blog and giving me the information. See you are a no-reply so I have to come here to reply to you. I like commenting on comments. In your profile you just need to make your email available unless you can't for some reason. I have never had any issues with this, only with anonymous commenters being on. So if people don't comment to your comment it could be because of your email in your profile. It's not a big deal, it's just the reason I can't reply.

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  7. Wow. I know it's so true. We'll never forget.

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  8. Wow. I know it's so true. We'll never forget.

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